Last updated on January 12th, 2016 at 12:07 pm

working mom guilt

When you return to work after having a baby, you will probably experience a lot of emotions, worry about whether your baby will be ok in childcare, glad of the chance to be able to interact with adults for a change, but then guilt about feeling this way. These feelings of guilt will probably not go away easily, but there are ways that you can reassure yourself that you are doing the right thing for your family.

You will become more efficient

When you are a working mom, you probably will not spend as much time in the office as you did before. This is not to say that you will not put as much effort into your work, just that you will become more efficient. If you have to pick your child up from nursery at a specific time, then you need to make sure that all your work is completed before it is time for you to leave. This efficiency could mean that you start to automate some of your tasks, and making the most of HR systems can be one way that you can do this.

It is an investment in the future

The time that you spend at work after having a baby can be looked at as a sacrifice that will pay off in the long run. You are in effect gaining five years of experience that you may not have had if you had waited until your child reached school age before returning to work. If you can use this time to further your career, then any sacrifices you have made during this time will pay for a better quality of life for your whole family.

Childcare can help your child’s development

There has been a lot of bad press about how children who attend childcare settings from a young age may have behavioral problems in their later stages of childhood. However, there are other studies that are not so widely publizised. It has been found that children who attend day-care may develop more quickly than other children their age in areas such as cognition and verbal comprehension. Mixing with other children of their own age will also stand them in good stead for when they start school. The bottom line is that your child is going to be just fine in whichever childcare setting you choose for them, and you do not have to feel guilty that they may feel abandoned.

You get some ‘me’ time

This is one aspect of working that people often feel most guilty about, but the truth is that time away from your child can be good for you. Having adult company other than your family is good for your mental health and it can help you feel more valued as a person, not just as a mother. It also means that you are more likely to appreciate the time that you do get to spend together and that you will ensure that this time is fulfilling for both of you.

Making the decision to go back to work will certainly be easier if you enjoy your job, otherwise the feelings of guilt may turn into feelings of resentment. While it is only natural to feel some guilt about leaving your children while working, once the whole family gets into a routine you will all find things a lot easier. Remembering the tips that have been discussed above can also help.

Do you often feel guilty for being a working mom? How do you deal?

 

Author

Hey there, I’m Tiffany! I’m a work-at-home mom of two rambunctious children (Jasmine, 9 + Sean II, 5) and recently widowed at just 35 years old. I've remarried and currently live right outside of Baton Rouge in Denham Springs, Louisiana with two adoring cats and a dog. Let's connect on Twitter @fabulousmomblog.

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